Blind Prophecy

One of the things about taking a retail job after having a “real” career for 10 years, it gives you a different perspective on things. I remember my first couple Black Fridays when I was working my way through college as more hectic and exhausting. This year, however, I was mostly irritated at the insanity and rudeness of human beings.

I worked the closing shift, which means I arrived as half our department staff was finishing up their shifts that started at 4 and 5 in the morning. The “doorbuster” sales were wrapping up and we had steady lines at the registers for the first few hours. Then the clock switched over and we went from having dedicated buyers on a mission to people who seemed to be shopping only because they were trying to fill their day with activity to escape family.

People came into the store in bad moods and took it out on the staff. Look, I don’t care how horrible and stressful your Thanksgiving dinner was, that’s no reason for you to act like an asshole to people whose entire weekly salary wouldn’t cover the leather jacket you’re buying your son.

My low point in the day came from a young family. Mom, Dad, and their little daughter aged 5ish. Dad went into the fitting room to try on about 20 designer label sweaters. Mom, tired and obviously cranky, decided she wanted to sit down. Instead of sitting in one of the 3 empty fitting rooms (which would have been fine), she spotted a low table covered in sweaters. Deciding her need to sit was the most important thing in our collective lives, she simply reached down and knocked two piles of sweaters onto the floor. No, she didn’t pick them up and move them. No, she didn’t accidentally knock them over. She deliberately pushed them into an unfolded, ugly pile on the floor. Then she proceeded to sit down and hold her little girl on her lap. The little girl decided that while Mommy was holding her, she’d make an even bigger mess by pushing more things off the table. I had enough when the young girl started playing with the mannequin sitting on the table, threatening to knock it to the floor as well. So I mustered up my most subservient, friendly, empathetic smile and said, “Ma’am, I can’t let you sit on that table, it’s not load-bearing and it could be unsafe.” Without even looking at me, she replied in the nastiest voice possible, “Well, I need to sit somewhere.” “You could take a seat in one of the fitting rooms.” “I can’t do that, those are men’s fitting rooms. I’m staying here until my husband is finished.” “Okay, but can you at least keep your daughter from playing with the mannequin? I’m worried it might fall of the table and break, or hurt someone.” At this point, Mommy Dearest, without another word to me, yanked her daughter around and forced her to sit with folded arms for the next ten minutes through a sort of obnoxious bear hug hold I’ve only ever seen with toddlers in church. Her husband didn’t like any of the sweaters he tried on and left them all inside-out in a pile in the dressing room. I’m sure they both thought I was unpleasant and rude, but I did my best to keep the internal “I’m gonna cut a bitch” thoughts from leaking through.

Other highlights: since we were sponsors of the Fountain Square tree-lighting ceremony, we got a crush of people at the end of the day (most of them were looking for a bathroom or bringing their little one in to see Santa); I hate my store’s coupon policy – they put so many exclusions on the coupons that they’re basically a useless piece of bait to get folks in the store; and why is it so difficult to pick up a pile of sweaters or folded pants, remove the size you need, and set the pile back down? Must you simply yank it out of the bottom of the pile and mess up everything that was previously sitting on top of it?

You know, I’ve never really understood why people are so rude to those who work in service industries. A waiter, retail clerk, receptionist, bartender, hotel cleaning staff, or flight attendant has to be pretty intolerably awful to me before I’m going to give them attitude. Okay, some of my coworkers aren’t the brightest bulbs in the landfill, but give me a break. I’m constantly getting this condescending attitude from douchebags in business suits who assume a 30-something guy working retail must be a moron. I constantly want to tell them that despite appearances, I’m most likely smarter than they are, that I’ve had a great career doing things that they would find fascinating and much more exciting than whatever it is that they do that causes them to look so lifeless and tired, and that I chose to take a year off from high-stress career stuff to center myself before 3 years of law school and 10 (or more) years of student loan repayments as a young lawyer.

But really, I just need to remind myself of that. Pulling a 9 hour shift on Black Friday can be stressful. After you’ve been on your feet for 8 and a half hours, those customers who refuse to believe that the store is actually closing can be stressful. Rude, inconsiderate assholes who feel good about themselves by picking on folks working for something close to minimum wage can be stressful. Wondering if I’ll get enough shift to have the money I need saved for when my student loan payments come knocking again in a few months is stressful. Not having the time or money to visit my family this holiday season can be stressful. But I honestly don’t care about this job in the least. If I were laid off tomorrow, my only concern would be finding another job to tide me over until my teaching gig (which I do sorta care about) picks up in the spring.

Somehow, I’ve got 6 days off in a row. My next shift isn’t until next Friday. Unless they change the schedule on me, though, it’ll be pretty solid after that through Christmas.

So we had Thanksgiving dinner a night late so that some of our friends could be there after doing the family obligation dinner on Thursday. After I got home, we had about 6 people come over for some turkey and pie. I’ve spent two nights watching marathons of True Blood and Weeds on the computer (I just finished watching Kiss the Bride again – I think it’s a flawed, but very cute movie). I have an idea for a novel poking around in my head, but it’s not quite ready to come out. I think I’ll spend some time this week flushing out a plot.

I also got my first law school decision back. It seems I’ve been waitlisted at one of the top 14 schools in the nation. It’s not an acceptance, but it’s not a flat rejection, either. It was also the first application I sent in, and each application was stronger and better put together than the ones before it. I anticipate hearing back from at least one more school before the New Year, and I’m betting on an acceptance from that one. Most of my decisions will probably come in January – when I’ve also got to work on my financial aid applications.

Anyway, now you’re caught up.

Filed under: personal, work by Jere Keys