Marry, F*ck or Kill
Wednesday, July 8th, 2009This week’s game is focused on television news personalities.
| Choice 1 | Choice 2 | Choice 3 |
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| Anderson Cooper – CNN’s silver fox, never officially “out” but barely “in the closet” and a Vanderbilt. It’s great fun to watch him squirm alongside Kathy Griffin for New Year’s Eve and despite “knowing nothing about sports” his arms fill out polo sleeves quite nicely. | Keith Olbermann – the liberal lion of MSNBC’s evening line-up, Olbermann’s impassioned special comments regularly ignite discussion and capture the emotion of the movement. Keith also hosted SportsCenter for years and still appears on ESPN’s football show. | Carlos Watson – probably the least known of this week’s guys, he hosts the late-morning show on MSNBC. Named to People‘s hottest bachelor’s list in 2004 (and still a bachelor? I’m just sayin’), he’s a Harvard and Stanford educated lawyer, basketball player, and founder of The Stimulist. |
To review the rules… You must choose one who you would spend the rest of your life with, one you would have a freaky-monkey one-night stand with, and one who you would put to death*. You tell me who you choose and why.
*standard disclaimer: we are anti-death penalty, we play this game as a thought exercise, not an endorsement of murder. Also, we are sex-positive and believe that two people can have crazy one-time sex without shame or emotional baggage. Finally, for the purposes of this game, we all live in marriage equality jurisdictions.
My choices from last week:
Oh, True Blood, why do you have so many hot guys?
Marry: Eric + Lafayette. So apparently I go for the “bad boys” or something.
F*ck: Jason + Eddie. If my experience tells me anything, it’s that guys who look like Eddie are wild in the sack, and guys who look like Jason don’t have to be (but, as we’ve seen on the show, Jason is). Sounds like a great night, but I’d kill Jason if I had to deal with him day-in and day-out.
Kill: Bill + Sam. I just find them a bit predictable and boring.
I don’t want to kill any of them!!!!
Marry: Keith Olbermann — brilliant, good looking, and a star on the rise
F*ck: Anderson Cooper — so long as it’s not just a one night fling… truly a silver fox
Put Aside Non-Violently: Carlos Watson — but only because I have know idea who he is — but he sho’is pretty!
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OhmiGOD, this is a damn difficult choice!
F*ck: Carlos Watson, cause he is without a doubt the sexiest of the bunch. That was the easy part.
I’d want to marry both of these guys (are gay multipule marriages legal anywhere?) I think they’d both be fascinating to talk with and spend time with. But, if I HAVE to choose…
Marry: Anderson Cooper, the determining factor being the fact he’s a Vanderbilt, and therefor has heaploads of money, and always will.
But since I’m going with the money as the one to marry, that leaves, and let me assure you how much this absolutely pains me to say this…
Kill: Keith Olbermann. Oh, the shame I feel….
HUGS…
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Marry: Anderson because he can keep me in the style to which I am unaccustomed and something has to keep me warm at night because it likely won’t be him. Money helps dull the pain.
F*ck: Carlos, he’s hot.
Kill: Keith, sorry baby, you’re just not my type, nothing personnel, never heard of you.
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Marry: Anderson – Despite my interest in slightly older men, I never really got why so many people thought he was cute. But I’ve recently started to ‘get it.’ And he does have nice arms! And if marrying him meant that I could possibly meet Kathy Griffin, then I’m obviously going to do it!!
Go to 2nd base with: Keith – He’s passionate.
Kill: Carlos – Not my type. And I don’t like his name. lol.
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Tam: You’ve NEVER heard of Keith Olbermann???? Wow. Well, when you’re tooling around the great USofA, some evening at 8:00pm, make sure you turn to whatever local channel is MSNBC and see the wonder that IS Keith Olbermann.
HUGS…
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Marry and have lots of sex with during the marriage – Carlos because he is the hottest and the smartest
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Marriage- A. Cooper, cuz he’s the gentle Pepaw of my dreamz.
F*ckercopterz- C. Watson for no reason other than I’d rather have my baby kittenz eat my eyeballz for dinna than have sex with …
K. Olbermann- He has the same face of one of my best friendz from high school’s mom. Too weird.
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Marry: Carlos Watson because as the saying goes, “Once you go black, you never go back.”
F*ck: Anderson Cooper. Carlos wouldn’t mind, I’m certain, and honestly, who doesn’t want to f*ck him?!?
Kill: Keith Olbermann: I’m sorry, but sometimes, he can be really annoying.
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Fuck – Keith Olbermann, only because I couldn’t possibly kill him, but marrying him might sentence me to a lifetime of special comments. About everything. Imagine a Special Comment about not flushing the toilet. Jesus, it’s like a living nightmare.
Marry – Anderson Cooper, only because he’s such a sweet and interesting little thing who really needs a fag hag in his life with more dimension than that horrible redheaded comedian who has too many teeth.
Kill – I hate to have to kill him, because I am told he’s very smart, and he is nice to look at. I simply have no idea who he is because I HAVE A JOB, JERE. Let’s just send him to a farm where he can run and play for the rest of his handsome years.
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[...] choices from last week: Marry: Anderson Cooper. He’s got Vanderbilt money and could keep me in the manner to which I [...]